The Smallness of the World

Coincidence? Or not. You be the judge.

There are these ideas of "pay it forward" and "random acts of kindness".  I try to participate in these when I can.  But this isn't about tooting my own horn. This isn't about me at all. It's about the how it all happened. So in that spirit....

I try to make it a habit that when I donate to someone I know on Go Fund Me, I find a stranger to donate to also. I don't chose someone haphazardly, usually I look through the creative category or the "near me" filter. I scan the funds and find something that resonates with me. A dancer with a scholarship to the Alvin Ailey school. An independent film maker invited to show at a film festival in Europe. A woman with health issues living in my city fixing an old car as therapy (same model car as the first car I bought).
This time I start with the "near me" filter and scan through several pages, click on a handful of "read more" buttons, looking for one that just "feels right".  The only thing that makes me click on this particular one is their first name...Kitten.  Not strictly local, it's in SF...but close enough to check out anyway.   A story of starting over, in a safe place, away from an unsafe situation. It stirs enough in me to check out any links to get a further feel of "rightness". There is a link to a Facebook account, so I click and read about his story, snooping through the public posts. There is a lot of love and support being offered and appreciated, so far so good, but I'm still not convinced this is the "right" one. I see a comment, a rather blunt one, in a tough-love kind of way. It's from a person with a very common last name, but a little unusual of a first name. It is also the name of someone I was acquainted with (but not FB friends with), funny that there might be two of them. I don't for a second think it might actually be the same person.  But then I glance at the "Friends" list and see that Kitten and I do have a mutual friend. And because of how small the world is, and because our mutual friend once did a cancer run event in my honor, and because our mutual friend passed away much too young, and because I went to a memorial service this past weekend for another woman who passed away much too young because of cancer, I give a small donation to help Kitten with his new life.






Life is not a Disney ride

X's and O's

 Stream of consciousness writing January 2004 (edited and formatted)

Begin. Be gentle, go slow. Baby steps, tip toe, tip toe. TicTacToe.  #  X's and O's  Hugs and kisses from an absent mother. Always a note, so I will always know.

"Don't be afraid, I will be back soon XXX OOO." 

One for each of us.  I didn't know, thought they were all for me (or if you were reading all for you.)  

X's are kisses, this is the love, the exuberant, messy "I don't care who knows".  But kisses can leave me cold. There are just too many ways to mess them up. Too slobbery, too hard, like a peck from a chicken, chapped lips, bad breath, have good aim or you'll kiss someone's nostril. The intimacy of allowing someone's lips to touch yours. Your breath, your words come out from your lips. Sustainance, food, drink pass through them. Such a symbolic area. Reserved for VIPS. Unless I have bad breath.
But the O's, the O's were for hugs, the quiet, the strong, wrapping around and holding me up. O's  can be anytime, happy, sad, anytime, long, short, soft, hard, half, whole, A frame, patting the back, side by side, heart to heart.  So versatile, those O's.  I liked them better, I knew I was loved with those.





Love, 
     Mom
     XXX
     OOO

High School English 1977

Word list:
recollect, compelled, retort, restraint, irrelevant, aspiration, seasonable, refiner, dispelled, pertinent, insinuating, concur, initiative, imparting, facilitate.

Assignment:
Use all of the words in a story.

My freshman attempt at being clever:
 I recollect a long time ago, when I was compelled to stay after school. My teacher told me to sit down, I answered with a retort. I should have restraint myself because sitting down is irrelevant. After school I had to write a composition on what I wanted to be. I wrote that my aspiration was to become a seasonable fruit refiner. Later that night I broke into school and dispelled her pertinent papers down the hall. Next morning when I went to school my teacher kept insinuating  that I broke in the school, but of course I didn't concur with her. Finally I took initiative and told her she was not  imparting good knowledge to the students. When I got home I got some ice to facilitate the black eye I got when she threw a book at me.

Really?:
Restraint does not equal Restrained
Dispelled papers...not so much.
Ice does not facilitate black eyes, but I think you see what I was going for there.

I could go on, but I think I'll just sit in the corner for a while.





A for effort?